Wednesday 22nd August 2012

This was the day I had a telephone conversation with a cousin I didn’t know existed.

My father Tony was also totally unaware that the sister he adored and who was like a second mother to him had a son who was now 64.

Flora had to give him up for adoption as she wanted him to have a life she just couldn’t give him.

Paul made contact with me after seeing my family history website that had information on his mum

Flora Beatrice Pearce.

After losing his adoptive parents Paul felt the time was right to find his birth mother Flora.

So after finding my site and after a few emails backward and forward Paul and I decided it would be a lot easier to speak one evening.

You know when you meet someone or speak to someone for the first time and you feel like you’ve known them all your life?

This was one of those occasions.

I was so focussed on giving Paul all the information I had on his mum and 2 brothers

I almost forgot he was my cousin!

I shared an amazing moment with Paul.

He was thrilled that he had found his mum even though she had passed away some years ago.

I sent him a photo of her via email while we were talking, unaware of the impact this would have on him. After 64 years to see your mum for the first time must have been an emotional experience.

It all went very quiet and for a moment

I thought he’d hung up on me!

I passed on the information I had to his 2 brothers, David and John.

David already knew of another child.

While John seemed shocked and surprised Im sure he was aware too.

John was sceptical at first and needed proof.

Paul gave us copies of his adoption papers.

We met at the Black Lion pub in Patcham.

It was a day I will never forget.

To share the moment the 3 brothers met.

Now for the amazing bit!

Just to give some background information.

Most of my family were brought up as

Jehovah’s Witnesses.

I was at my sister Bev’s for Sunday dinner

and they had invited a friend Andrew.

We got chatting and he was telling a story of a witness who lost their mobile phone in

brother“Paul Blackmans” car

“That s odd” I said

We have a new found cousin called

Paul Blackman!

He drives a Jaguar

“So does this one said” Andrew!

It turns out that our long lost relative was one of Jehovah’s Witnesses in Lewes.

Paul had spent his life just a few miles away and went to the Lewes Kingdom Hall

of Jehovah’s Witnesses !

I immediately sent him a text.

He was in the garden having just got back from the meeting and had invited the visiting

public speaker for dinner.

Paul was as shocked as us!

If only my mum Marge was still here.

She would have been overjoyed at this.

We are sure that she knew Paul but not the connection to our family.

Aunty Flora or “Aunty Girlie” as we knew her was a lovely lady and always made us feel so welcome when we went to see her.

I can’t begin to imagine how distraught she must have been having to give up her son for adoption.

She was such a caring person

and would have been heartbroken.

It may be that the only person she could

share her sadness with was her sister Elsie.

Paul’s birth name was Robert

Elsie went on to have a son called

Robert.

She must have known and offered support.

Flora would have been so proud of her son and of the life he went on to have.

Her decision was the right one.

Paul had amazing adoptive parents

and a lovely family.

Its just a shame we had to wait

64 years to find him!

phil@pearcefamilyhistory.co.uk

www.pearcefamilyhistory.co.uk